Denise Hildreth

When I made the decision at the end of last semester that the theme for our Fall Bible Study would be all on faith, I had no idea God would take me on an incredible faith journey this summer. But, my…my…my did He ever. To the point that I’ve decided that next semester will be on “Living the Happy! Happy! Life!”

But what I can say is that what He has shown me regarding trusting Him over the last two years, escalated to an even greater level this past summer. The one thing I have heard him say over and over is that a deeper place of faith is needed because this is a season of repositioning.

I’ve received so many e-mails this summer about people’s places of faith. How God has been growing them, stretching them, rearranging the very structure of their lives, creating no option, but complete and total trust. Isn’t it fun! So, obviously God is up to something extraordinary.

So on Wednesday our new study will begin-

and I have such an spirit of expectation of what God is going to do.

We will study The Author Himself…Jesus.

The Father of Faith-Abraham

The Flawed Faith of Peter

The Faith of a Prostitute, a dying woman, a Judgmental Hypocrite, a Pair of Sisters, and some unrelenting friends.

And my prayer is that starting this Wednesday morning at 10:15, God will meet some women in Franklin, Tennessee and take us to a new place of Faith! If you think of us pray for us. If you want to join us let us know. But no matter what, know that God is growing you to place you in a new place-to reposition your heart. Open up your hands, open up your heart, and enjoy the ride.

1. Do you like blue cheese?
Love it! Especially on the BLT Salad at Cheesecake Factory

2. Do you have a tattoo?
Are you kidding me. I cry when they take my blood.

3. Do you own a gun?
I’m southern. Absolutely.

4. What flavor of Kool-Aid was/is your favorite?
Cherry- and that would be “was”. I’ve switched to other sugar addictions.

5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments?
Is there ever a good reason to have to go to the doctor?

6. What do you think of hot dogs?
Love them, especially at baseball games and movies.

7. Favorite Christmas movie?
Elf- “Satan! I know him!”

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
During the week-unsweeten Green Tea.
During the Weekend- McDonald’s Coke

9. Can you do push ups?
I go to a boot camp class. Our trainer is addicted to push-ups. So that would be yes, grudgingly.

10. What’s your favorite piece of jewelry?
I have this dainty diamond cross that is my absolute favorite.

It’s not easy to make the decision that you want to be well. Honestly, avoiding healing is much easier. At least in the short run. You push the pain away. Run from it. Distract yourself from it. Put something else in its place. But to heal, to press in and cry and scream and get angry, ending up a wasted heap in the floor of your home, lying across your bed, or in your car parked in a back parking space at Kroger, well who in the world wants to do that.

But the realization I had this week regarding healing and pain, is that God is so faithful not to make us deal with something until He knows our heart is ready. Did you hear that? If you didn’t, read it again. I’m not going anywhere….

I remember September a year ago hearing news that if I had heard a year earlier would have devastated me. A friend apologized profusely for not telling me earlier and I told her simply, “I couldn’t handle it earlier and the Lord knew that.”

So when another revelation of my past came flying into my present this past week, I realized it wouldn’t be here if the Lord didn’t know I was ready to handle it, face it, repent of it, deal with it. It hurt. I won’t lie to you. I know I write fiction, but I try to lie as little as possibleJ Because to confront this truth meant I had to confront my own lie that I had told myself for almost seventeen years. And how do you do that? How do you admit you’re that wrong?

But yet in that moment I knew this was pivotal in moving forward. And I knew that if God had waited all this time to bring it to the surface in this way and at this time then He must have in me the ability ready to deal with it. So I did. I left my friends house whose probing questions had made this truth rush to the surface and I climbed into my car and I cried the entire way home.

Me and God had a long wailing conversation on how sorry I was. How I had so missed Him, even when He had tried to protect my heart. How I had simply ignored Him. I thanked Him for redeeming what probably didn’t deserve redeeming and for giving me another chance at living. By the time I got home I was pretty spent. But I knew that revelation, that experience, that acknowledgement would change me forever. And would allow me to walk into the next chapter of my life free.

So often in our journey God will come to press us. He will graciously lay before us a revelation of our past, of our choices, of our character, and to confront it would be to have to break up in the face of a lie that we’ve believed about ourselves or others for years. To do it would be to admit we were wrong. To do it would force us to experience pain, admit failure, to hurt. And so in the middle of our forward progression, we stop all movement. Because we don’t want to move forward through that.

My sweet friends, it wouldn’t be here, right in front of your face if God hadn’t wanted you confront it head on, and if he didn’t know that you were more than capable. You haven’t gone backwards because something has surfaced in your life that might be old and painful. Instead, you are moving forward and God is saying, “We’ve got some great places to go and we’ll get their faster and easier if you keep letting go of these bags you’re carrying around.” And so as we drop one and then another and then another the way gets easier, lighter, kind of like “my yoke is easy”. He really meant that you know. And He’s trying to make the journey easier. Let’s help Him out.

May you cry? There’s a possibility. May you get angry? You very well may. May you have to admit your wrong? I’m thinking you might. Will you die from it? No, you might actually begin truly living.

1. Any plans today?
Today is my last stint at being a bridesmaid. And I mean it! But my friend Ashley is getting married tonight…

2. How many states have you lived in?
3

3. Biggest annoyance right now?
Walking down the aisle in front of people…yet grateful I’m not the one they care a thing about seeing.

4. Last song listened to?
All the songs on Tommy Walker’s Live album. I can’t quit listening to it.

5. Can you say the alphabet backwards?
I don’t plan on trying.

6. Do you have a maid service clean your house?
Yes, her name is Denise.

7. What do you usually do during the day?
I read…I write…I pray…I eat…and I hang out with my friends and family.

8. Do you use the word ‘hello’ daily?
I say “Hey”.

9. Do you like cats?
Well, any cat I’ve ever had has died. Not sure what that says.

10. How did you get your worst scar?
I was 4- we were at my Aunt Margaret’s house after my grandaddy’s funeral and I sat in a folding chair and flipped over and busted my head open on the coffee table. Still can see the scar today.

Rene, Never the Bride is all about the main character’s qeust to find a husband. Mind sharing with us how you met yours.

Worse bridesmaid’s dress you ever had to wear: It was too loose up top, if you know what I mean. And this was particularly disastrous because it was strapless. So you can imagine how frightened I was to walk!

One of my sweet friends sent me a note last Monday after reading about my watch. He said, “I know God is going to reveal even more to you through finding your watch. And he was so right. As the week has gone on I’ve shared that story about half a dozen times with friends. Each one, the same look of shock has crossed their face. And almost every one has gotten something different from it.

One friend looked at me as I had shared with him all the purging I had been doing leading up to that week that the first thing he thought of when I told him I had found the watch was, “It’s time. That everything you just did, it was time for that. And it was. The deep severing in my heart of old ties that God did through that whole house cleaning and garage sale experience, was stamped by my sweet Father that “it was time.”

The other thought came from my mom. She said, “You know I thought how God is never late. His time isn’t ours, but He will restore to us in His perfect time.” Isn’t that the truth. He never has been one to operate on my time schedule. But He sure is faithful to always show up. And at just the right time. Because a week later and that suit would have been out of my site forever.

The other thing the Lord to revealed to me personally was He will not let me miss Him. When my heart is to serve Him and to please Him and to have relationship with Him, He will place Himself right in my path where I can’t miss Him.

I’m not sure what you may need to purge. Maybe it’s old memories. Maybe it’s old ways of thinking. Maybe it’s a relationship God isn’t in, or a dream God didn’t plant. Well, it’s time. In order to get to the next place sometimes we have to be willing to let go of the previous place. To sever all ties and step into the new things God has for us.

Maybe some of you thought God had forgotten. You’ve’ waited a long time. Placed some dreams on shelves, some hopes on hold, and your hearts been sick. Trust me, God is never late. And He is faithful to show up at just the perfect moment.

Or maybe you thought you might miss Him. Even though your prayer, pounding, desperately tugging at His hem, you’ve thought He might let you miss Him. He won’t. He will make sure you find what He desires for you to have.

Faith is an interesting commodity. It holds with in it the very ability to set our hearts free, while at the same time shackling them to our Father. What I’ve learned is He’s a pretty good partner. And He’s never late. I never dreamed I’d have to wait 10 years to get my watch back. But I can tell you this. What He has shown to me through that one little act, is far greater 10 years later than if I had found it 10 days later. And it was worth every waiting moment to see Him the way He has allowed me to through this.

Don’t rush Him. Because you might miss something amazing….

More totally unimportant quetsions…
1. Look to your left, what do you see?
My water bottle, phone, two bottles of nail polish, a hair clip, four thank you notes I just wrote to mail tomorrow, some chapstick, a pen and my notebook

2. What color is your watch?
silver and gold

3. What do you think of when you hear Australia?
Hugh Jackman and Nicole Kidman- saw that movie a while back.

4. Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru?
Drive thru

5. What is your favorite number?
7

6. Who’s the last person you talked to on the phone?
My mama

7. Any plans today?
I’m doing this at night, so sleep is next on the agenda.

8. How many states have you lived in?
3

9. Biggest annoyance right now?
My back is hurting…been working way too long today.

10. Last song listened to?
Some song by Tommy Walker I had never heard before. It’s his new live album.

11. Can you say the alphabet backwards?
I am way too tired to try…

12. Do you have a maid service clean your house?
Yes, me…and I cleaned the house today too!

13. Favorite pair of shoes you wear all the time?
When my book Savannah from Savannah came out my parents bought me a pair of Kate Spade flip-flops because that is what Savannah wore. They are the softest flip-flops ever and they are lime green and hot pink-too cute!

This week we’re hanging out with my sweet friend and amazing Author, Rene Gutteridge. The first book of hers I read was a book entitled My Life as a Doormat: In Three Acts. It was laugh out loud funny and I couldn’t put it down and I knew I would love this girl! And love her I have come too. She has been my roomie and our annual writer’s retreat and she has become my precious friend. Her gift for story-telling is enchanting and her new book Never the Bride was my favorite pick for summer. I’ve asked her to hang out with us for a while and tell us a little bit about herself and her book. I know you’ll love her as much as I do.

Since you are married, what impacted you the most in the journey of this young single woman?

First I loved the character of Jessie Stone. She made me laugh. I loved who she was on the inside. Secondly, I was attracted to the notion of surrender. Even though I am married, I have many things I have not yet surrendered to God, or things I keep taking back.

What do you want your readers to leave with when they close this book?

I never like answering this question directly
because I like how God can minister differently to each person through the pages of a novel. One person takes away hope. Another truth. But I do desire that each person knows how much God loves them, which is one of the central reasons I was attracted to this story.

You also write suspense novels. Is it hard going from one genre to the other? Granted being single can be scary, but I’m just saying….

It is difficult. I have to completely adjust my mindset. I had been in comedy for a couple of years and had to transition into a suspense recently and that was extremely difficult. For me comedy writing is harder, so it’s nice to go into suspense, but I have to change the way I approach the story, and sometimes that is easier said than done.

Of all the musings I’ve done over the last year none have received the response of last weeks. Apparently, a lot of us are in a place of faith. Basically rephrased, a lot of us are in a place of deep challenge. So, the good thing is that we’re in a pretty big club. It seems God is growing a lot of us in the place of our faith. And I honestly believe it is necessary for where we are headed. I believe the seasons ahead will require people of great faith. And great callings require people of great faith. So, let’s look at this season, not so much as a trial, but as an opportunity. And as a place of deep confidence that our Father must have in us, to know that He can trust us for the deep places. Remember, that’s where the most fish are caught…

But in places of great faith God is gracious to give extravagant reminders of His intense and passionate love for us as well as reveal to us that He doesn’t miss a thing. Know how I know? Well, you know I’m going to tell you…

The last two months have been an intense season for me. A season more intense than I have experienced since the beginning of my divorce. Yet in the middles of the doubts and questions and tears God settled over my heart a clear directive that it was all from Him and I could trust Him with it.

But in the middle of it I felt like He was asking me to do some house cleaning. Literally. To clean out the attic, the closets, the drawers, the garage and get rid of anything that was no longer used or was not mine. I knew this purging had a real significance for my life. Though, I’m not sure even yet the extent to what it was all for, but I knew it was necessary and I knew it had to be drastic. So, I began and it all culminated in a garage sale this past Friday.

Now, go back to my wedding day in 1994. I was sitting in the floor of my tiny apartment sharing some time with my parents, just talking when they gave me a card and my mother gave me my something old, it was her antique watch that she had bought when she was a girl. It was beautiful. And it was priceless to me. Because it was her. But in 1999 one Sunday at church the chain broke on it. Afraid it might fall off I thought I had put it in my purse. And since that day I had never seen it again. For ten years I have prayed and asked God to let me find that watch. It had been a priceless heirloom to me. And every time I moved (which was often) and every time I cleaned out a drawer, I looked for that watch.

On Friday, my dad and I were in the garage pricing items and there was a suit there was a suit there of my ex-husbands. I hated the thought of selling it for nothing and asked my dad what size he was. I looked on the inside of the jacket to see if I could see the size and I didn’t. So, I stuck my hand in the pocket of the jacket and felt something odd. I grabbed it and began to pull it out and when I got the first piece to the opening of the pocket I knew it immediately it was my watch. I can’t tell you the emotion wrapped in that. It was so great, I had to sit on the steps and have a good old fashioned “thank you Lord” cry.

There was so much wrapped up in that moment. There was the natural thought process of all of it. – The suit had never been worn since that day. It had never been sent to the dry cleaners. It was still at my house and not taken or given away. And I just decided that was the suit I would stick my hand in the pocket of. All of which was crazy! And a miracle!

But it was what it said to my heart that got me the most. That the place of purging I was in, God was right in the middle of. That when God wants you to have something He is gracious not to let you miss it. And it may seem lost to you, but nothing is lost on Him. Delay is not denial. And He will restore lost things.

That is what I speak to you today. The place of a faith may be hard. But there are things we are going to discover here that being in the old place would call us to miss. We may be asked to purge some things but oh my what God is going to give to us for our obedience despite the sacrifice. And things may seem hidden from our view, some things for a really long time, but God knows right where it is and He knows how to get it to us and He knows when it will mean the most.

You are not lost to God. He knows your name and He knows where you are. And He is testing you because He trusts you. He trusts you will stick to it. He trusts you will believe when you can’t see. He trusts you will do when you don’t know why. And in the middle of it He is going to reveal His Godness on a whole other level.

Hold on my friend…you are about to be amazed…and about to get back some lost things…

First Word that comes to mind

Animal- skunk

Space- huge

Gun- Annie Oakley

Chicken-fried

Boys name- Thomas ( I have no idea why) But it was one of my uncle’s names.

Girls name – Suzy (Again no clue- You asked for the first thing)

Paper- Homework

Color- Ochre (For all you southerners that is not the same thing as okra.)

Letter of the alphabet- Z

Clothing- jeans

Food- fried chicken- (Hey you started it!)

Drink- Dr. Pepper (That one’s going to drive you crazy isn’t it…)

Smell- skunk (Back to number one)

Bubbles- Lawrence Welk

Pink!!!- Bubble Gum (You already had me thinking about bubbles!)

Smartie- Pants

Orange – Julius

shoes- comfy

Happy- Gilmore ( And I’ve never even seen that movie..)

Random word- Word (Well, it was the last thing in my head…)